S1.E30: Emotional Scale
An emotional scale is a ranking of emotions in order, from the most negative to the most positive. In this episode we discuss having an awareness of our emotions at any given time and using our toolbox to move up the scale when we're feeling less than positive. When we improve our emotions we improve our attraction point as well.
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Podcast Music Credit: Caleb Britton @NeonBrotherDC
We're two sisters who believe that the purpose of life is to enjoy, create and have fun. We believe that as humans, we can have anything we want and things are always working out for us. Experience has taught us that the path to getting everything we want begins with ease. If you believe in miracles and happily ever after, or even if you just want to, then this is the podcast for you
Speaker 1 (36s): There. I'm your host, Kayla Rain. I'm your cohost Adria Sha. And welcome back to attract it with ease. Hi Adria. You are in an unusual place today. Tell us where you're at. I am I'm in sunny, beautiful or Orlando, Florida. Awesome. So you must have started your new job. Things are going well. Yes they are. Yeah, they are. Well, I wanted to point that out to our listeners first thing today, because we are recording over the phone today.
So if our audio sounds a little bit different that's because Adrian is not in her normal recording area and she's recording from her phone, but Adria tell us what you're thankful for today and why all three of my gratitude items are related to my job. I have had, it's been pretty intense training and I have had major tests along the way, including several huge ones today. I'm very grateful that I have passed all of my tests so far.
Yes. I'm grateful for the friends that I'm making in this new job. We I've been thrown together with a bunch of people from all over the country that normally I wouldn't have encountered. And I have a feeling that some really good friendships are going to come as a result of it. And then I'm just grateful for this opportunity. I'm doing something I've wanted to do for a long time that both thrills and terrifies me. And so I'm grateful for the opportunity to do it.
I love that. Well, congratulations. And thank you for sharing. I'm so grateful that we were able to record, even though you're away. So her Ray for technology, right? So I have a few things I'm grateful for today. Number one, I've really been thinking a lot about how grateful I am for my fake hair and their listeners don't know this, but I actually have really thin hair, like, like way embarrassing, thin hair and I a little over a year ago, found a hair solution that I love.
It's real human hair, but it's fake. Meaning it's not my hair. It's not a wig is a combination of extensions and like a crown topper. But if you've seen the cover photo for our podcast, you've probably kind of seen my hair or you've seen pictures on our website or on Instagram, but my hair folks is fake and I freaking love it. And I am so grateful that instead of looking like a, I dunno, zombie with my hair, looking like it's falling out because that's what I feel like with just my own hair.
It feels so patchy and thin and stringy. It's nice to be able to feel beautiful and luxurious. And honestly, if I didn't tell people, most people probably wouldn't know that my hair is fake. So I'm, I'm grateful for that, but I don't know if I've expressed that on the podcasts yet, but I'm putting it out there. It's a great one. The next thing that I'm grateful for is my quiet time. I've talked a lot about how I'm grateful for my alone time and my time.
First thing in the morning after my alarm goes off and I stay in bed for another 30 minutes, but oh my gosh, I just love having time to think and relax and just focus on my day. And I've had a lot more of it lately than I have in the past because now Dan and I have totally different schedules and it's something that I've really grown to appreciate. And so I'm grateful for my quiet time.
And then the third thing that I have is my wind chimes. And I might've mentioned this one, but it's super windy today. So you may even hear them in the background because I'm recording from home. But I love the sound of my chimes. And Adria dad made us each a set of chimes years ago, mine were stolen a few times. I've asked dad to remake them a few times. And so with the help of dad, Dan actually made this set of chimes, but they are to replace the ones that dad made us.
And they are just so beautiful sounding. And I'm appreciative of those today. I love it. All right. So Adrian, I'm going to admit to our listeners that the past little bit, I've kind of been in a bit of a funk, and I think that you've been going through some things with your new job, and you've probably been on an emotional rollercoaster of sorts as well recently. And so, as I was thinking about what I wanted to talk about this week, I thought, you know what, let's just address the fact that we have ebbs and flows and life is dandy and wonderful and it's whatever we choose to make of it.
But that doesn't mean that we're not going to have good days and have bad days. And, and it's not always going to be sunshine and daisies even we'd like it to be. And so we've had a few different episodes where we've kind of talked about this topic in a few ways. I'm thinking back to, I think it's episode number 11 is titled the tool kit. You didn't know you needed. And we talked about different things that you could use or have in your back pocket.
So to speak, to raise your vibration. Do you remember some of the things we talked about in that episode, Adrian, I will never forget music because that's a big one. Yes. We talked about having our happy playlist and songs that we've pre-prepared that we know will raise our vibration, put us in a good mood for sure. We talked about things like bubble bass. And I think we talked about time in nature, and I've been thinking about how much I just love going for a long drive sometimes, and that could be listening to music, but just, you know, especially when the weather's nice to be able to open the sun Rue for roll down the windows and just go for a drive in nature or something scenic.
And to me that that would be a way to increase our vibration, sometimes hot tea or a nice warm beverage, something that soothing and slows us down or a nice glass of wine. Those could be things that could raise your vibration. If you're into that. I think we talked about listening to audio tapes or YouTube videos and meditations and journaling. And that whole episode is, is basically about different things. You could kind of have pre-prepared or a list of things you could pull from to raise your frequency or raise your vibration.
And so that's a great episode to listen to if you haven't yet, we also, and I believe this was episode eight, talked about choosing a better feeling thought, and that episode is titled do it because it feels good. And if you haven't listened to that episode, I recommend that you do, because that one, I get real honest about some of the difficult things I've been through in my life, but in today's episode, I want to kind of take the concept of both of those conversations, choosing a better feeling thought, but also having some things in our back pocket to help us raise our vibration.
And I really want to talk about something that we've talked about briefly, but not in detail. And that's kind of an emotional scale or a vibrational scale. We've talked about how our emotions directly relate to what we're attracting, meaning we know what we're attracting based on how we feel. So what I want to do is I want to talk about an emotional scale. I want to kind of like walk through what that is, and then talk about how we can recognize where we are on the scale and then how we can use some of those resources we've already discussed to kind of move ourselves up the scale.
So there's a few of these that you can find online. When I say emotional scale, some people have actually literally kind of graphed them out, but let's just start listing off some emotions. And let's just to make things simple. For starters, let's just talk about various emotions and we're going to put them either on the positive side or the negative side. If it just had two halves, two hemispheres, which area did they fit in? So I'm going to list off some emotions and then you can add some, if you can think of some, and let's just kind of start out by talking about what emotions are positive, what are negative.
And there's probably going to be some that are neutral. So in no specific order, Adrian, I'm going to list an emotion and you tell me if it's positive or negative. Okay. Got it. How about forgiveness? Positive. K blame, negative love, positive pride. Ooh.
It could be. You tell me on that one positive, but brides also belongs on the negative side. Okay. We'll leave that one up for debate. What about fear? Negative joy, positive trust, positive, hopeful. I feel like that was positive, but almost in the middle hopeless, negative anxiety, negative despair, negative serenity, positive anger, negative neutrality.
Ooh, that one's probably pretty new. Okay. So these are just does the list of emotions. We've got happy. We've got sad. We've got playful, blissful, fearful, guilty, shameful. I mean, we probably could go on and on and on, but these are all various emotions that we've probably experienced in life. And if not all of them, probably most of them. And sometimes we go through a series of these emotions in just a single week or even sometimes a single day because things can happen that can shift our vibration.
We could start off having a great day and then something could set us off or vice versa. We could start off having a bad day and someone could do something for us that really makes us feel hopeful or, or blessed or something. Okay. So as we talk about these emotions, Adriana, let's try and take some of these and put them in order so to speak. So we have some negative emotions, let's start with the negative emotions and let's try and rearrange them in as to like, which are the worst and which are closer to being positive.
Okay. So I'm just going to give you two sets and you tell me which one is worse and which one's better. Okay. Okay. Okay. So which is a worst emotion, anxiety or anger? I think anger. Okay. What about anger or guilt? Ooh, I think those are probably pretty close, but ah, you know, I'm not sure anchors maybe the maybe worse.
Okay. What about anger and humiliation? Anger is probably still worse, but I don't know. I should be asking you, can you answer so right or wrong because what we're vibrating at and how we feel when we're feeling those emotions is really what we're trying to get at. And the reason we're going through this exercise is to kind of put together our own scale of where's the very bottom, what's the worst emotion you can think of.
What's a little bit better than that. What's a little bit better than that. And working our way all the way up to what's the top or best emotion we could fill. So we kind of, we've organized a couple of those things. Anger was towards the very bottom for you that may or may not be the case for our listeners, but you kind of picked it over some of the others. So let's go to kind of the positive side for a minute and let's see if you can order some of these range. Some of these, how about trust or forgiveness?
Forgiveness is higher. Kay. What about hopeful or forgiveness? Forgiveness. Okay. What about serenity or forgiveness? Serenity. What about serenity or bliss? Hm, that's tricky.
Like right off the top. My first instinct is that bliss is higher, but I, I don't know because I think maybe bliss is fleeting in comparison to serenity, which would probably put serenity higher. Okay. What about we'll S we'll leave bliss high for men. What about bliss and love? Which is higher.
Okay. What about love and joy? Joel? Why probably I realize all of these that it's, it's, it's very much, you know, like how I'm viewing these, the lens, my own personal lens. If I'm viewing these emotions, what exactly to me. And that's, that's exactly the point. Is that what your emotional scale might look like? Isn't necessarily going to be the same as what my emotional scale looks like.
Someone could really not have good feelings about love right now. Love is a lot lower on the list. I was thinking if, if we can agree and I don't know if we can, the enlightenment is at the very top. Then I am kind of asking myself where do all those things rank relative to enlightenment. And maybe that's not the top of the list for everyone, but it should be. I think that's what we all supposedly desire to achieve as enlightenment, whatever that means.
Right? So the end goal, that's what they say. They say a lot of things though. So yeah, it will. If enlightenment is at the top, that's kind of, the whole idea is whatever all of the emotions are. And maybe some of these emotions are things that you can't relate to, or you wouldn't describe as emotions that you feel, but whatever the emotions that you feel are, it's kind of creating that list and then deciding, okay, what is a better feeling than the one before it?
So once you have this list in place, and let's just say that enlightenment is the top and then it's joy and then it's love, and then it's bliss and then it's serenity, you know, that's kind of your way working down. And then we move into kind of the more neutral state, which is probably like satisfactory, hopeful. Those are probably kind of in like more neutral, more on the positive than negative, but not like crazy positive.
They're just like a little bit positive. Right? You said whole is kind of iffy. Okay. And then moving a little bit lower, maybe feeling disappointed and frightened or anxious, maybe feeling regret or hopeless, like as we're kind of moving down the skill. So number one, and I think I've said this on a podcast probably at least once before. Probably every podcast rolling. No, but it's important for us to have an awareness of how we're feeling in any given moment.
Because if we don't how we're feeling, we don't know what we're attracting. So Adrian, I'm going to put you on the spot and you can lie. Cause I won't know, definitely going live when in doubt. Okay. But the most recent emotion you can think of feeling today, give it a name. What would you say is an emotion that you relieved? Okay. So wherever relieved, relieved, relieved.
Okay. So wherever that is on the emotional scale, we know it's better than a lot of things like fearful and anxiety, right? Because we're relieved. Those things are kind of gone now. So if relieved is where we're at, even though that's a somewhat positive place, because it's not the bottom of the scale, the next question is what's just above relieved. What feels a little bit better than relieved. And it doesn't have to be, I mean, we didn't write out a scale. Pleased.
Is that what you said to say? Pleased. Pleased. Okay. So rather than relieved. Okay. So relieved is like, whew, thank goodness. Right? Like woo. Skated by that was I'm pleased is like, oh, I'm actually happy about that. Okay. So I can see that there's a difference between those two emotions. So instead of like, Ooh, that was a close call. It's like, oh yay. I like that. Okay. So if your state, if your emotional state is relieved, how can you go from relieved to pleased?
What are some things you could do to change that emotion? Just one notch, not all the way to enlightenment, because it's just like choosing a better feeling that you can't just think something that's like a complete opposite and jumped from there to you. Can't get there from here. You can't get there from there. So if we're just talking incremental vibrational steps to increase our frequency, to increase our mood, to turn our bad days around, which it's not relieved is probably not a real bad day, but how can we jump from relieved to pleased?
What could you do? Well, if I just take a minute to think about why I'm relieved, that's the first step towards counting my blessing. So I'm already feeling a little bit better because I'm already focused on the positive and not the thing. I just escaped. Absolutely danger. I just escape the danger. Okay. So gratitude. Gratitude is great. Gratitude is always a big tool in being able to shift your vibration or your frequency, higher gratitude, attracts all good things and totally changes our mood.
What else could you do besides thinking about things you're grateful for meditate? Do you meditate? I meditate once in a while. I would say a few times a month. I meditate. Okay. Well for our listeners, I was just explaining if you do meditate. Yeah. It's a great way to increase your frequency or your vibration if you don't is probably going to bring it down because you're bringing stress on yourself by like forcing yourself to do something that you're not comfortable with.
So for sure, choosing something that you enjoy doing that you're used to doing, but absolutely meditating can help you achieve enlightenment. Right. All right. So we've talked about our emotional scale. We've talked about some things we could do. We've got our resources of like journaling time in nature, bubble bass, happy playlist.
I think in episode 11, we talk about YouTube videos or listening to audio recordings that really will lift you up. I'll tell you what sometimes when I'm like in a bad, bad funk where I feel like I almost can't help myself. One of the best things I can do is to turn something on to listen to. And music is a good one, but music because songs only lasts for a few minutes. My emotion may only last for the length of that song and dependent upon the next song that comes on is it's, I'm just going to be kind of fleeting.
So for me to be able to like look up some YouTube videos based on the law of attraction or something, something uplifting, even if it's just like a motivational inspirational speech or talk or something. I know I'm kind of being vague, but sometimes just kind of releasing my thoughts and listening to someone else that can speak positively and uplifting is helpful versus trying to rely on myself to do it for myself.
Have you had that experience, Andrea? Absolutely. Yeah. So for me when I'm like, at my worst, I either do nothing because I don't feel like doing anything. And I think we said this on a prior episode too. It's okay. It's okay to have bad moments. It's okay to have bad days it's expected. And we've even talked about how, when you first are new to utilizing the law of attraction, a lot of people almost are hard on themselves for having bad days and bad moments and kind of like, oh, I know better.
I shouldn't be like this. And that's okay. We, it is okay to have those moments because those moments are our opportunities for growth. It's our opportunity to say, okay, I don't like this. So what is it that I want? We've we've talked about that on prior episodes. And so recognize when you're in a funk, when you're in a bad mood, when you don't like how you're feeling and use it as an opportunity to say, okay, what can I do to shift this just a little bit?
And what is it that you're trying to achieve? Because you're not trying to achieve joy when you're angry. You're probably not going to get there, but what feels a little bit better than angry, relieved. Right? So how do you get from angry to relief? It's like, I'm so relieved. I didn't stab him. That could be a problem. But yeah, when you're angry, you're probably not going to meditate.
So what can you do? Well, you could turn on a happy playlist. You could draw a bubble bath. You could go for a long drive. You could journal all of your feelings and get them out so that you've released it. You could watch a funny movie or listen to something inspirational, all of those things. And we've talked about choosing a better feeling thought. So a better feeling thought is the opposite of what you're thinking, the opposite of what you're feeling. And it's not trying to convince yourself of something that's not true, but it's trying to focus on the opposite of the thing that's causing you to feel the way that you're feeling.
So Adriana, tell us another emotion that you've felt maybe in the last week, aside from relief. Can you think of any other emotions you felt recently? Yeah. The other day I was feeling extremely overwhelmed. Okay. So what's something you could do when you're feeling overwhelmed to increase it to the next, better feeling emotion, which would be maybe what what's just above overwhelmed, maybe hopeful.
Okay. And that might be true for me. That feels like a little bit of a big jump to go from overwhelmed to helpful. But maybe that is the next step to me, probably like something a little more neutral, but that's not to say that you're wrong. I just, to me hopeful feels like on the positive side and overwhelmed, fills on the negative. So to me, I have to move through some neutral emotions to get to the positive.
But in any case, if you're feeling overwhelmed and I'm sure you have overcome that, because you said you're relieved today, what could be something that you could do to kind of ease that feeling of overwhelm and move to the next emotional state? Something like a bubble bath or a comforting food? We haven't talked about food. Yeah. That's a dangerous one. Double-edged sword, but sometimes it does help.
I think for sure it can be helpful. And again, our, about anything determines its effect on us. And so if we feel like we can't eat bad food, then we can't eat bad food, but if we think we can eat bad food and if it helps us, then we can and, and we should. Right. So all of that's debatable, but I guess where I'm going with all of this is that like I started out saying I've been in a little bit of a funk. I feel like mine is probably hormonal.
Probably at least once a month, I go through like a phase of like meth, not really into anything, not really feeling myself, feeling kind of like life is so like, blah. And it's not like I've been on happy or upset, but I've just kind of felt like I've been in a funk. So it's recognizing when you're in that state of less than joy, less than happy and saying, okay, what can I do to raise my vibration, to change how I'm feeling to shift things.
And it's again, not trying to go all the way from met to woo. My life is amazing. It's incredible. I can't believe this is my life, but just trying to shift it to the next emotion. Because when you move to the next emotion, then you can work on moving to the next emotion above that. And then you can move to the next emotion above that, but it's a scale and you have to take it in steps. And sometimes you will be able to, to jump a few emotions to get to another one, depending on how severe your feeling it or why you're feeling it.
Sometimes it's just literally thinking through and rationalizing or reasoning with yourself that what you're thinking is, is not rational. But other times it's like you've got to put some work in and you've got to put some time in and you may need to try several of the things in your toolkit. You may need a bubble bath and music and chocolate and meditate and some hot tea and a long drive and a good night's sleep. Like it might take you a couple of days and it's okay.
It's okay to have the bad days, but it's just not staying stuck. It's finding yourself there and using it as a learning experience to move yourself forward. So do you have any thoughts or things that you want to add or questions about the emotional scale that we've been talking about? No. I like the idea because it's easy in the context of the scale to gauge where I am and I had to figure out how to move just a little bit in the appropriate direction.
So I think it's a helpful tool. Okay. So our action item for our listeners this week is to actually make a scale of your own, to take some time, to write down whatever emotions feel on a somewhat regular basis, write them all down. Don't have to write them in order, just make a list of a bunch of emotions and then try and put them in order for yourself. And you can make it as a visual that you post on your fridge or that you put by your vision board.
Or you can just have it as a note on your phone, but something where you have an actual list of emotions that you decide the order of, what are the higher feeling emotions for me, what is neutral and what's negative so that you can refer to the next time. You're feeling less than the top of the scale where you can say, okay, today I'm feeling a little bit indifferent. So what's above in different, maybe in different is pleased.
So how can I be pleased today? What can I do that would be pleasing? What can I focus on that would be pleasing? What can I pull out of my tool kit that will make me feel pleased and looking for ways to shift your emotion. And so aside from just taking yourself out of a bad day, Adrian, how do you think all of this relates to the law? Well, whatever I'm putting out is what I'm attracting.
So I want to be in the positive hemisphere. Absolutely, absolutely. So that's the whole thing, like I said, it's not a, it's not terrible to have a bad day, but you don't want to stay stuck there because all you're attracting is more bad days. So the faster that you can move yourself into we'll call it, like Adrian said, the positive hemisphere. Cause we started out with two hemispheres. If you can move yourself into the positive hemisphere, then at least you're attracting positive things. The higher you are in the positive hemisphere, the better things you're attracting.
So it's not just about increasing your emotion. It's about increasing, increasing your vibration, which will in turn, improve your mood, but also improve the things that you're attracting, the better things you're attracting, the less bad days you're going to have. And so it's all kind of full circle. It all comes back around. So again, the action item listeners is to make a list of the emotions that you feel on a regular basis, and then put them in order from highest to lowest vibration, find your order, keep your list somewhere that you can refer to and use it along with the tools from episode 11, things in your toolkit.
Plus using ways to think of a better feeling thought from episode eight, using all the tools we've talked about to increase your frequency and move your emotions higher on their emotional skill. So Adria that's it for this week. Once again, I'd love to say that we have new reviews and a new winner, but we don't when things slowed a bit on the review side of things. So do you want us to tell our listeners about why they should leave us a review?
Yes. We will draw a name each week from those people who have submitted reviews of our podcast and the winner will receive a custom bracelet from us with your theme word of the year. That's right. So every week in 2021, we will choose one listener that has left us a review. Now it has to be a review with words, meaning if you leave us a five star review, we are so appreciative, but we don't know your name. It doesn't tell us your name.
So we need to know at least your username, if it's not your real name in order to unknown, see you as a winner on the podcast, but we will choose one person, no matter what platform you leave a review on each week to win a custom theme bracelet with your theme word of the year. These are unisex bracelets. You can see what they look like right on our website, attract it with ease.com. And if you haven't listened to the first 10 episodes, go back and listen to those because those are our jumpstart module.
The first 10 episodes were designed to go together to help you jumpstart everything you're trying to attract in your life. And we also have a free workbook that you can download from our website, attract it with ease.com that goes along with those 10 episodes. So go back and listen to those. If you haven't episode 11 is your tool kit that we've referred to a few times in this episode. And as always, we would love to hear from you. So leave us some feedback, leave us a review and thank you for listening, Adriana. Thanks for making time with us while you were away.
Hope your training goes well and we'll catch you next week. Sounds great. Thank you. Have a good one. Bye-bye 